Dara O’Briain @ Hammersmith Apollo
Last Friday I went to go and see Dara O’Briain at the Hammersmith Apollo thanks to a birthday present of two tickets from my sister. Sadly being afflicted with ineptitude and stupidity I was unable to find a guest to take with me to experience this event.
As Dara explained during his show comedy gigs are really one of those things were you actually have to be there to get it all. This is in stark contrast to that thing your friend was explaining pitifully in the pub last night and in order to dismiss your bewildered expression finally states that you just had to be there.
So anyway, the evening began with my fleeing the office despirately needing to get back to my flat so I could grab something to eat and head back out. The Hammersmith & City line was apparently not running in top form that night so I gauged an extra 20 minutes on the journey to compensate. Unfortunately the DLR was not to save my plans of food before I went out. So when I go back to my flat I had enough time to have a quick pee, grab my tickets and set off for the tube station.
The journey to Hammersmith was fairly uneventful, and I arrived at about 18.00, 30 minutes before my ticket said I needed to be there. Turns out 18.30 was only the time at which the doors would open. So I wandered off in search of sustenance and happily found myself a Subway and procured myself a toasted Meatball Marinara sandwich, pure bliss. I’d also brought a bottle of water with me from home as I’d been having some problems with mild nausea, dizziness and general topsy-turvy feelings when moving. Expecting to go straight into the Apollo and sit down at 18.30 when the doors opened I took the last of my painkillers at 18.15 to give them enough time to take effect before my sides would be stretched to splitting. Once I was in the door I made my way up to the second floor as I had a circle ticket. This actually seemed to be a pooling area where the audience could water, feed and relieve themselves, I took advantage of the latter two, not wanting to drink due to the painkillers.
At 19.30 the doors to the seating area were opened and I made my way to my seats. The seats slowly filled and the dull chatter of people talking increased with it. As the clock struck 20.00 Dara emerged from behind the curtains. From that point on, until the intermission, any feelings of social exclusion I had been feeling due the aforementioned lack of buddy disappeared. The audience became linked in laughter, it was brilliant.
Now I could go into the jokes and gags and all the hilarity of the event but unlike your friend in the pub last night I truely can say you just had to be there.
That said I will leave you with some things to ponder on. Given our state in the war on bacteria, 99.9% domination if reports are to be believed, and with a number of good bacteria being won to our side through a parallel propaganda war. I ask you this, what would happen if you poured Dettol into a Yakult? Does a company need to do anything more than chain together the words max, fusion, power and stealth in ever more elaborate ways to sell products to men? Is it ever possible when on the phone and needing to convey a letter phonetically to not completely blank all the words beginning with that letter with the exception of all the dirty ones?
